[ her brow furrows at that, watching him in a silent consideration for a moment. she knows john has never really been the chatty type, but for some reason here, she feels like there is something more he is not saying and she can't help but be somewhat concerned. ]
What's up, John? [ and yes, her tone is calm, but showing she wants to know. ]
[ her frown just deepens at that, her eyes scanning over him in a clear sadness/concern, not sure what to say for a brief moment. ]
You should have told me, John. [ and she has to stop herself from moving over towards him and just pulling him into some odd type of hug (he seems like he needs one, okay?) ] You shouldn't have to deal with this type of thing alone.
[ because even if he did have Cameron, she really didn't think that girl was capable of the empathy that he might need. ]
[ she just nods in understanding, her face still obviously one of concern. ]
You can stay here as long as you want, [ she quietly said as she moved somewhat closer to him, her hand nervously moving towards him in some awkward attempt at a pat - almost as if she thought she could find a way to comfort him with that.
(yeah, she sucks at this type of thing. But it's been so long since she has done anything like that, that she has to try to remind herself how to even begin - she’s trying okay?) ] ...I don't mind.
[He takes her wrist - not her hand, just her wrist - in his hand and holds it there, tight, quiet, because he never touches anyone anymore, and Cameron doesn't count. Cameron isn't human, she doesn't actually understand this, he knows it.]
[ Her eyes move down to his hand around her wrist, sighing slightly at the sight. She knows this is awkward and she might not know what to do fully, but she knows (well assumes) a hand on the wrist isn't going to bring you much comfort.
So without much thought, she is looking up at him with a clear concern, as she attempts to jockey herself into a position she can at least try to wrap her other arm around him in some odd hug. ]
It's okay John. [ a quiet beat ] I'm not going to leave you.
[It's awkward at first, because John is not good with contact, but then he begins to move to wrap his arms around her, his face going into her shoulder, his arms around her waist. She's tiny like Cameron but warm, she breathes and it's not perfectly timed like a machine. Her heart flutters under his fingers where it's still wrapped around her wrist.]
[ she's nothing like a machine - she's awkward and unsure - and she doesn't exactly know what she should be doing right then, but she is trying her best (because that's what you do for friends).
and even without knowing exactly what to do. she knows not to say a word, and to simply wrap her arms around him tighter, not wanting to let go (because even she could use this hug) as her one free hand goes to lightly rub along back of his head in her odd attempt at comfort. ]
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I expect you to go running and screaming down the halls telling everyone, okay?
[ yep, a really bad joke. ]
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[Actually he never had that phase]
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[ yeah, she is actually joking right now shocker. ]
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[ SHE CAN PRETEND TO LOOK SERIOUS HERE, REALLY SHE CAN ]
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So what's that make you?
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Of course it does, you have to start question your judgment on becoming my friend here.
[ it's a small joke, and it might not come off like she hopes, but she really is just hoping to get john to relax some.
which is why she has to quietly ask: ] How are you doing though - aside from Kurt kissing you and all that?
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What's up, John? [ and yes, her tone is calm, but showing she wants to know. ]
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My mom is gone.
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When?
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[There's a rasp of pain there, suddenly]
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How long have you known?
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A few days.
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You should have told me, John. [ and she has to stop herself from moving over towards him and just pulling him into some odd type of hug (he seems like he needs one, okay?) ] You shouldn't have to deal with this type of thing alone.
[ because even if he did have Cameron, she really didn't think that girl was capable of the empathy that he might need. ]
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I don't know if you noticed, I'm not good at talking about what I feel.
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[ and she will keep pounding that fact into him till he comes to accept it and knows he can be honest fully with her. ]
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[It's the most honest thing he's ever said to her.]
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You can stay here as long as you want, [ she quietly said as she moved somewhat closer to him, her hand nervously moving towards him in some awkward attempt at a pat - almost as if she thought she could find a way to comfort him with that.
(yeah, she sucks at this type of thing. But it's been so long since she has done anything like that, that she has to try to remind herself how to even begin - she’s trying okay?) ] ...I don't mind.
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So without much thought, she is looking up at him with a clear concern, as she attempts to jockey herself into a position she can at least try to wrap her other arm around him in some odd hug. ]
It's okay John. [ a quiet beat ] I'm not going to leave you.
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and even without knowing exactly what to do. she knows not to say a word, and to simply wrap her arms around him tighter, not wanting to let go (because even she could use this hug) as her one free hand goes to lightly rub along back of his head in her odd attempt at comfort. ]
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